Ok the next person who says "Wow you really are growing a belly" gets a foot IN THE EYE.
First: I'm growing a Davis baby- which means despite my messed up body's every attempt to stunt the child and deliver it early, it will still be the approximate size of a pee-wee football player when born. Ethan was 3 weeks early folks- after 8 weeks of pre-term labor. Babies gain about a pound a week at the end of pregnancy. Had he been "on-time" he would have been... do the math quickly now... almost TEN POUNDS.
Second: I'm on albuterol 4-6 times per day to make the lungs work. While it very much helps with the wheezing, albuterol also makes me swell up like the Stay Puff Marshmallow man. And, just like Ghostbusters, I'm the mean twisted version of the "most harmless thing I could think of".
Third: I'm one of those "lucky" women who carries a baby straight out front. I'd say "It looks like I stuffed a basketball under my shirt", but that would be lying. I carry straight out front and low. I stuffed a basketball in my panties. (Don't try it at home, trust me.) Any of you remember the infamous pumpkin belly shot? Yeah well "I carried a pumpkin" is my motto.
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2 comments:
Will you please paint something fun on your belly like last time???
Just tell people you are breeding a healthy dose of shut up. And if they touch your belly again, tell them you are waiting on some lab work from the CDC.
Works like a charm every time.
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