10 Years

Ten years ago today my family and friends gathered with Mark’s family and friends in a church yard in Harrodsburg, Kentucky. A bagpiper started to play.

I ripped the lace of my dress on the door hinge as I exited the church to walk into the yard and down the aisle of white chairs and yellow roses. The ring bearer rebelled three steps down that same aisle. A train blew its horn as the ceremony started.

But what do I really remember about that day? The sun was shining. Teresa, my maid of honor, kept trying to make me laugh and gave me the hiccups instead. My bridesmaids and flowers girls, cousins and friends, were giggling like the little girls they were. I remember Tom in full dress uniform with Gel by his side, looking on with that amused glint in his eye as if the two of them knew some secret that Mark and I were about to discover. I remember Todd teasing me; Jon rolling his eyes; Alex making lewd jokes; Dalton, the rebelling flower boy, toddling among us.

Mamma was glowing. Linda’s smile threatened to overwhelm the sunshine. I remember Holy and Chris happily serving cake and champagne. I recall Tami and Todd playing with Dalton to keep him entertained while the big people partied. Ed looked so proud that day. I remember my father taking my arm and saying “It’s time”.

The tears come now when I remember Adrian ducking his head in embarrassed pride as he took Morgan and Lena by the hand to lead them down the aisle. I remember Pappa asking me “what’s that for?” when I kissed him on the check as we danced. Today I truly hope there is an afterlife so that they, and Uncle Eric and Mark’s grandfather, can look upon us and remember the part they had in that wonderful day and all the days afterwards.


Over the past ten years Mark and I have been through literally dozens of jobs between us. We’ve purchased two houses and sold one. I uprooted us and moved us hundreds of miles from our families and our comfort zones- on a chance. We’ve survived living in a single room in Baltimore, sleeping on an air mattress. We’ve lived through tornadoes and a hurricane and we’ve shoveled snow drifted far above our heads. Katya still drives us crazy and there’s two boys in the family now. Two wonderful, adorable, funny, witty, sarcastic, maddening boys who make everything else seem so very worth it.

Through more trips to the hospital than some folks make in a lifetime….through weddings, funerals, long car rides, even longer separations on business trips….through the terror of almost losing the boys and the real pain of losing another pregnancy… through the earth shattering grief of losing loved ones… through the terror of 9/11 and anthrax… through career changes and all the ups and downs of office politics (and national politics)…through bad rental agreements and hideous homeowners associations... through family drama on all sides… through growing older, gaining weight, losing weight, losing hair… through losing friends and gaining new ones…
Mark has always been there for me. He makes that line in our wedding vows- Where you go, I will go- a reality and a promise everyday. He is my cuddle bunny, my rock, my darling, my husband.

Whither thou goest my darling, be it for another 10 years or another 70, I’ll be proud to do it by your side.